The Beginning

     Today marks the very first day of my brand new blog. Anyone reading this probably knows that I tried to blog before...and failed miserably. I've asked myself 100 times, why did I fail at blogging? Well, let me spell it out for you:

• Inconsistency- I only wrote when I had time, I never made time.
• Spontaneous Posting- I didn't have as much understanding of my target audience, and so I pretty much rambled and talked about whatever I liked.
• NO target audience- yes I said, "teenage girls," but that's a beyond broad topic, and we all know it
• Not enough passion- I was blogging for other people in my mind, not as much for myself

     Basically...this list could continue on and on. But here is the message: ALL OF THAT IS CHANGING. For those of you just picking up on this blog- I just got married this summer, and life is changing drastically. Not only do I have the time now to keep up with a blog, but I have the passion for myself. I realized I cannot write simply for others to read it, and sure my heart and soul were in those posts- but I have to write, and have the drive to write for myself primarily, and not just because I feel a need or duty. 

     YOU- my wonderful readers, though you may be few, are invited to read along the course of my journey. In addition to this, I now know who I am focusing on. Everyone. 

Specifically the ladies of all ages in the world, but anyone who wants to read my messages can. I'm focusing on people, ordinary lovers of life, who struggle every now and then, who have to pay the bills, who try and

 make ends meet with a smile on their face. 

I'm talking about Breaking Through The Grey

What (I'm sure you're asking) does that even mean? Why is it the title of this blog? Why am I passionate about it? 

I am convinced that in the day-to-day life, every single person faces grey moments. 

World English Dictionary

grey or gray  (ɡreɪ)
— adj
1.	of a neutral tone, intermediate between black and white, that has no hue and reflects and transmitsonly a little light
2.	greyish in colour or having parts or marks that are greyish
3.	dismal or dark, esp from lack of light; gloomy
4.	neutral or dull, esp in character or opinion Grey. I chose G-R-E-Y because gray is commonly associated with growing old, while grey can refer to the monotony of life.

So what even are these moments? I am certain that every person reading this knows EXACTLY what I am referring to. You have had them. Chances are- you're probably digging through your memory and thinking of your grey days. I certainly have them. The fascinating thing is- they are different for EVERY person. Some of you may be going through depression, some of you may have a past you don't quite know how to let go of, or deal with, some of you may have a future you are terrified of, or a bill that will not let you rest, a job that makes you stressed and unhappy. 

Grey moments are the day I woke up and felt completely alone after essentially best-friend breaking up with my now Husband. The day I realized I would never be an actress on Broadway  Just the other day when I had no motivation to go to work, to go to class, or really do anything but sleep. 

Grey is the unhappiness of life, the unfair moments, or the simple day-to-day where you feel like you aren't cutting it. Grey are the times when you don't quite seem to know the girl in the mirror anymore, or even her purpose.

I propose that "grey" days, or moments, are essential to life. They are the reminders that we are human, that sometimes we don't feel like we have the strength the keep going. 

But if we never had those moments, how would we know when to slow down, or how to appreciate the

happiest moments. 

And while they are essential...I also know how vitally important it is to move past them, to keep going in life, to get yourself out from under the endless cycle of dissatisfaction with life- to Break Through the Grey. 

I challenge you, and myself as I begin this blog to find the moments in life that are grey, and to first, recognize them for what they are and what they teach you, and then to break through them. 

This blog consists of my thoughts, my ideals, my ways of breaking through the grey. My music, and pictures, my perspective on life. I write about things that make me happy, realizations that life is the best gift and blessing I could have ever been given. I am writing about my 20 & married life, and the things that make a difference on my grey days. 

Most of all, I write because I struggle too, and this is how I break through the grey. 

You know- maybe not every post will hit home with you, but maybe one will. So stick around- add your email to the list, and let me try and help you break through. 

THE DAY is cold, and dark, and dreary;
It rains, and the wind is never weary;
The vine still clings to the mouldering wall,
But at every gust the dead leaves fall,
And the day is dark and dreary.
My life is cold, and dark, and dreary;
It rains, and the wind is never weary;
My thoughts still cling to the mouldering Past,
But the hopes of youth fall thick in the blast,
And the days are dark and dreary.
Be still, sad heart! and cease repining;
Behind the clouds is the sun still shining;
Thy fate is the common fate of all,
Into each life some rain must fall,
Some days must be dark and dreary.

                                                                                                              -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

My message today is that you can break through it. I challenge you to start thinking of HOW, and tell me. Make comments, send me a message. I'll feature them on my next post.

Life is worth living, and thriving, not just surviving. Break through the Grey. Happy Monday, and welcome to the beginning of something new. 

Speaking of Priorities

 April 2013
    Good Afternoon lovely readers! It has been just about insanity the past couple of weeks as the final inning begins.  My last exams are less than a month away at this point, and like the other millions of college students, I'm starting to feel the pressure. When it gets to this point in the semester, I tend to turn into a blond Hermione Granger. 
 
"What am I studying for? Are you crazy? You realize we need to pass these exams to get into the second year? They're very important, I should have started studying a month ago, I don't know what's gotten into me ..."

     Suffice it to say that, yes...I become a bit busy during the final weeks of the semester.  In addition to that, I've been busying myself with a few new things.  (Songs will follow soon...trust me)  I've recently decided it's high time I found myself a boyfriend.  So after a long wait of about a year and half, I finally brainwashed my best friend into dating me.  Just kidding of course, I didn't have to brainwash him.  Things are going swimmingly, and I'm sure as the weeks dwindle down and that spring air fills my head, you'll be seeing more and more posts about what this relationship is teaching me, and the songs I've written about it.  BUTTT for just a teensy preview- his name is Eric, and he is (in short) absolutely wonderful.

Today what I really want to address is Priorities.  I work at the Career and Academic Success Center at BYU, and priorities are something we cover in almost every study skill lesson we teach.  What even are priorities???  According to dictionary.com:

pri·or·i·ty

1.

the state or quality of being earlier in time, occurrence, etc.

2.

the right to precede others in order, rank, privilege, etc.; precedence.

3.

the right to take precedence in obtaining certain supplies, services, facilities, etc., especially during a shortage.

4.

something given special attention.

To put it in layman's terms...priorities are the things that matter most to us.  We are often asked what they are, and have we sat down and written them out?  As a college students, it's just about vital for me to recognize them, and focus my time around them.  But what about for younger students, or older parents?  Are priorities important at that age too?? YES!

In psychology there is a principle we learn about called "Relational Importance."  What that means is, where you spend your time is where your heart lies.  Are you spending the bulk of your time on things that truly matter to you, your goals, your dreams, or are you allowing time to slip away and fade into yesterday?  I'm asking you to sit down and honestly evaluate yourself.  Where do you spend the most amount of your time?  Is it work?  Class?  Boyfriend?  Shopping?  Pinterest?  

When I was asked to do this very thing, I found that I spend the most amount of my time focusing on school and work.  I asked myself...is that really where my top priorities are? No.  I sat down and made a list of my priorities.  This is my list, (Yes I'm willing to share! It's basic, but you get the idea)

Spiritual Well-being
     I am a very spiritual person.  This is my top priority because it is my Heavenly Father who has given me all that I am, and guides my footsteps every day.  I am a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and I want to live my life in such a way that everyone knows that and never doubts it.  Regardless of my personal beliefs, I feel that the spiritual well-being of every person is important.

Family & Sweetheart
     This is one of my top priorities because my life would be empty without my family.  My family makes up a network of supporters, best friends, fans, and loving advice-givers.  I am ridiculously close to my siblings and my parents.  I believe in Eternal families, and therefore they take precedence over most other priorities of mine.  I believe in constantly nurturing those relationships I have with them.
     In addition to family, I place my sweetheart as a high priority as well.  Love is all about caring for the other person above yourself, and therefore I strive to make sure he is doing well and is taken care of.
Self-improvement & Goals
     As an individual and an intellectual, I believe in constant progression.  Yes, sometimes progression is slower than others, but there should always be growth.  I heard once that life is like a down escalator.  If you're not moving, it's moving down.  If you're working hard, and pushing yourself, you can continue to improve, even when faced with resistance.  I look for ways to educate myself about the world, and people, as well as help the lives of others.  I also work towards my talents and career goals, as I try to better myself.
People & Friends
     After my top three priorities, people and friends in general will always come next.  I LOVE people, and I LOVE helping people.  I listen, I advise, I help them burn old stuff, I'm a shoulder to cry on.  No matter what kind of homework is pressing on my time, I will always make room if a person comes to me. 
Service 
     Because I love people so much,  serving people is vitally important to my life.  It's not a self-fulfilling kind of thing, rather just that I genuinely love to serve, and feel useless if I'm not serving in some way.  I guess you could say I have a giant hero-complex.  People are my passion, and helping them is my obsession.
Finding Inspiration
     Life is difficult.  I find you can't do anything else if you have no motivation or inspiration.  So as an individual who is constantly trying to grow and help others... I look for inspiration everywhere.  I look for the random flower that makes my day brighter, and in turn it becomes a priority for me to show it to others, and find it myself.  Life is about winning the small day-to-day battles. 

Education
     I am a student at BYU studying Therapeutic Recreation, and therefore school is important to me, but I believe that education is more than just schooling.  It's a combination of experiences, people, and how you react to them that creates a sound education for an individual.  
Health 
     I am very devoted to living a healthy life-style and re-defining for myself and other women what health and beauty is.  I work towards loving the blessing of a body I have been given every single day.  Good food, lots of exercise, and (trying really hard) getting enough sleep.  These are essential to a healthy and happy lifestyle, decreasing stress, and being prepared to enjoy everything else in life. 
Working  
     Working is in my top ten priorities because if there is something to do, it is worth doing well.  I work almost every week day, and I thoroughly enjoy what I do. 

Leisure
     Leisure is not something I really get to enjoy as much during the week, and since serving and people and educating myself are more important to me- when I have spare time, it's usually full of those.  (especially the people) However, it is really nice every now and then to read a book or watch an episode of my favorite shows. :) Relaxation is essential a happy life, and so it's definitely A priority, just no the top one.


So now that you know my priorities, I can attest that those are the areas 
 I devote my life to.  I wish I could say I devoted as much time to my number one priority as I do to school or work, but it is what is in my heart.  I challenge you to sit down and make a list of where you spend the bulk of your time, and then make a list of where you WANT to, and WHY, and then determine how those two can meet in the middle.  This will help lead to a happier and more productive lifestyle, at EVERY AGE!  

Have a wonderful day, and happy prioritizing!

Never Less than Stunning

Spring 2013
     Good morning lovely readers! So I've a couple thoughts to share with you on this beautiful day.  It really is fabulous. Look. 

It's sunny, it's relatively warm (for Utah winter) and I couldn't feel more refreshed.  Lately, there have been some difficult trials in my life, and that's no real excuse, but it is my reason for not blogging more.  But I'm committing to those who read this...I promise to write more.  Instead of just writing down my ideas for posts, I'll make sure I just write the post instead ;).  

      What I want to share with you today though, isn't simply a list of the reasons I'm sorry for not being a better blog queen, it's how I feel today.  As I was getting ready, I was listening to a wonderful song by Phillip Phillips.  It's called Home, and it never fails to put me a glorious mood. I tried on about 32 outfits, only managing to find a good one for my interview tomorrow. Nothing for today! So I kept trying on outfits and listening to this song over and over.  When I finally had arranging the perfect outfit, I took a look in the mirror and thought, "Okay...this is decent. WHAT?! I forgot to put on any makeup!!!" Who forgets their makeup!?! So I quickly applied all the basics and put a red flower in my hair. 

     But then something caught me...what on earth was I thinking?  Yes...my outfit is cute, and the red flower is just perfect, my hair is in the right place...but is that REALLY what makes me beautiful?  Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to call myself beautiful- but when I looked in the mirror, that's exactly how I felt.  WHY?

     That's when it hit me what was different about the picture.  I FEEL beautiful.  I feel beautiful not because of the clothes and the makeup and the flower...I feel beautiful because I am happy, and today is beautiful, and WHY ON EARTH would I feel anything less?   

     My message for you today ladies is about inner beauty.   We always talk about it, and we talk about boosting it, and appreciating it, but yet it always seems just beyond our fingertips.  I've heard the old phrase "beauty comes from within," I don't know how many times.  I've heard it so many times thought because it is ABSOLUTELY TRUE.  I recently went to an old friend's wedding reception and she looked radiant.  My roommate/ best friend leaned over and said, "She looks so beautiful.  She knows she's beautiful, and everyone else can see it. It must be how happy she is." HOW TRUE IS THAT- for ALL of us? 

      Inner beauty is that feeling of being happy, and knowing who you are.  It's recognizing the flaws and the perfections in ourselves, and loving them both.  I'm not talking appearance.  I'm speaking about the quirks to our personalities that make us individual, unique, and yes BEAUTIFUL.  When a woman, or a girl is happy with WHO she is, she honestly can't help but be stunning, and everyone around her knows it, and sees it.  

     Woman are always looking for validation.  "Does my hair look okay? Can you tell I have a huge zit?  Do these jeans make me look lumpy?"  WHY do we ask these questions?  I CHALLENGE you- Don't ask.  

KNOW how you FEEL, and OWN IT! Stop looking for validation in other places, in other people, on Pinterest for goodness sake.  Look for validation in yourself.  Be happy with the woman you see.  She may not be perfect, and she may have some truly rough things to deal with, she might not be great at crafts or math, and she may not be a size 0, but she is INCREDIBLE, and she is special.  
      The only person who needs to know that is herself, and then the rest of the world will be blinded by that happiness and light coming from her; blinded by her beauty that radiates around her.  

     I wrote on my mirror, "Never less than Absolutely Stunning," to remind myself that my beauty comes from within and when I'm happy, I will always be beautiful to others around me yes, but more importantly to myself.

 Happiness is beauty, and when I feel happy with myself, I feel beautiful.  

    So I'm asking you to go look at yourself.  Go smile in the mirror and KNOW that you are happy, amazing, and NEVER LESS THAN STUNNING.  Remind yourself of this every day.  Work on the things that you want to change, and deal with the trials that come day by day, but above all remember WHO YOU ARE, and how beautiful that woman is every single day.  

Happiness is your choice, and so is beauty.  So remember, in my eyes, and in the rest of the world's, and in yours 

You are never less than stunning.